Photo Roryms CCANC
Day Five
Alan goes to the Diary Room in the morning for a chat. While reading the morning’s papers, he’s come across a story which he’s not so pleased about. They’re not going to commission a £65,000 statue of him outside St James Park after all. Big Transfer asks him whether he’s upset about the statues. “No, not really, it’s just that they’re saying that ‘it’s another snub’ from Mike when these plans have been on hold for more than two years. Actually, it’s just like Jackie Milburn Jnr says - ‘I suppose there must be more important things going on at the club at the moment’ - and he’s right. My contract negotiations, for one thing. Where’s my sodding contract? I wouldn’t mind signing some players as well.”
When Alan leaves the Diary Room Stanley asks him if he’s been crying, which Alan strenously denies. ”It’s cool to be a bit depressed every now and then,” Stanley reassures, “I was miserable when I went to Spain once.”
“What happened?” asks Alan.
“I just gave up and went home.”
Later that morning, he is talking to Cristiano, who’s boasting about everything Florentino has offered him since they arrived in Big Transfer House. “It’s super-awesome. I’m going to get my own Audi, a wicked new squad number, I’m going to be much more galactico than you.” Alan reminds him that he was once the world’s most expensive player, too. Cristiano giggles and says that he was 12 when that happened, and he cost nearly that much when he was in his teens. Alan rebuffs him by telling him about plans for the £65,000 statue, but when Cristiano points out that his new wages should mean that he can buy three statues of that quality for himself every week, Alan runs to the Diary Room and locks himself in there for two hours.
— — — —
The task for the afternoon is to do an impression. Carlo, who wins for his electrifying James Bond impersonation, is given the prize of a phone call to anyone he wants. He chooses to speak to Carlos. He explains all the great things he can do for him, and why he should hang out with him and Roman rather than anyone else in the house. In a cruel, Big Transfer-esque twist, however, the call is played live to all the housemates watching on the sofas. Alex turns beetroot, Rafael mutters something in Spanish, and Mark asks Garry how much money he has in his wallet. Carlos, for his part, is non-committal. “I like you all, guys, and we’re all having so much fun inside Big Transfer House that I’d hate to spoil the fun before, say, June 30 when my contract runs out.”
Day Six
Votes are in, and there are two people up for eviction this Friday. Alan received the most nominations - many because he looked so sad, but some suggesting that he doesn’t belong in the house because “he’s not in our league”. Also up for eviction is Ricardo, who was voted for by Carlo and Roman, as well as Guillem, who said in his nomination that “a Portuguese living in England and looking to go to Italy frankly isn’t my bag”.
When the results are announced, there are lots of hugs all around, as well as disingenuously shocked expressions on people’s faces. Franck tries to lighten the mood with a game of chase. Florentino joins in enthusiastically, as do Roman and Carlo - even Alex cheers up for a little while until Franck mentions that he’s 26 years old. Danielle suggests a rival game of chase in the other corner of the garden. Cristiano, slightly aggrieved that Florentino’s attention lies elsewhere, runs around with her. Stanley watches on.
Ricardo and Alan have a talk about their nominations. Both are quite muted, and Ricardo is bullish, saying he’d be quite happy to go. As the evening draws in and Harry calls everyone in from the garden for their tea, the pair conclude that whatever happens, neither of them are likely to be sticking around in Big Transfer House for long…
[...] Catch up on Day 5-6 [...]